We finally made it to 100 days of school last week. I thought when this day arrived this school year, I would be elated. Elated because my children are resilient. Elated because they kept persevering despite school now at home and home at school. Elated because they made it work. Elated because, though I am tired and would give anything to end homeschooling and the pandemic, my children are still alert, still steady, still determined, still clear about homeschooling requirements and still ready to keep being in school every single day. With them, with school this year at home, I keep knowing myself.

Take yesterday for example, my second son had his parent teacher conference and for the first time, no one had a problem with his intellect. Granted he still struggles with being independent and the teachers mentioned working with him to achieve goals that would reduce his dependence on us. But intellectually, he is above his grade level. I almost cried. If you know what we have been through with him, if you fully understand what it means to raise a special needs child, to ensure his educational experience perseveres continues even when he couldn’t speak for awhile, when he was kicked out of his very first school after attending for 2 days, even now in the middle of a pandemic, then you would cry to. I have no idea how we do it him. These days he seems so eager to go to school, even waiting by his laptop patiently for his teachers until they arrive. It may seem like a small feat, but watching his growth the past 100 days leaves me speechless at times. I myself have so much work work to do and work is around me all the time and yet, we still find the time to ensure that his school does not falter and it shows.

One of the teacher mentioned how she saw us, appreciated our consistency, our presence in his life at this moment because it is truly hard to homeschool a child like him. For some reason, it never occurred to me just how hard it has been the past 100 days. I was stunned by her words that all I could say was thank you for your understanding. Thank you for your patience with us. Thank you also for all you do. That’s all I needed. She freely gave me permission to finally feel elated that we made it to 100 days of school. I am. We are still steady, still clear, still alert and still determined to make the most out of the remaining days of school. But for now, this is my way of keeping 100 days of school in mind.