The past 1-2weeks has been a whirlwind. I am still processing it all. I am still making sense of how life can come so close to an end. I am still trying to make sense of how any plans you make, can literally change in a day, an hour, even minutes. Like how we changed my mama’s travel from one day to another because time was not on outside. I still remain in awe of the precious gift of time. How life and the time it gifts is a gift as well. How love is all we have in the end, to make sense of this gift.
To be surrounded by those you love is such a precious gift that i want to spend the rest of my life surrounded by the people I love. Not folks that are willing to tolerate me or folks afraid to see me fall and rise up again. But folks that never get tired of unpeeling any mask I wear. Folks that are willing to go deep, to sit down and listen. Cry too for when nothing makes sense. Like my dear friend Uzo. In the middle of her joy, how she made time for me is a precious gift that I will cherish. Then their are the people who came to my life expecting me to mentor them, like Ucheoma and Chisom. How they spend every time to mentor me keeps me in awe. How they know how to ease the burden makes me speechless always. I will never forget their precious gift of time and love. It too is a precious gift that every single experience together keeps gifting. Then there are those I literally call my father and mother, as if they literally gave birth to me, as if they were there when I was being conceived in my womb, as if they knew what I would become before I was even birthed. How they knew that we would need their company this week, how they provided insight and love, how they held us up even in the middle of our sorrows, how they spent time, keeps me in awe. To be surrounded by Mama Yannick and Papa Yannick’s love and time is a precious gift that I have no idea why it belongs to me, to my family, even to my children.
This past week has been the fourth most difficult week of my life, reminiscent of the week my dad and my grandmother passed, and the day my little 10 year old left us behind. To be this close to death once again, just a year after my nephew makes me realize that I truly want to spend the rest of my life surrounded by those whose love and light are a precious gift for these times. I don’t care for the world, for people, who are not ready to bring this to me. Save your time and energy for yourself. For me and my household, we will keep choosing love, with who love and accept us just as we are, for their love, for every single moment with them, every single time is a precious gift that I intend to keep for the rest of my life.